Loves Dandelions; Loves Books

Loves Dandelions; Loves Books

Book Reviewer, Writer, & Dandelion lover! 

Review
4 Stars
Perfectly Good White Boy by Carrie Mesrobian
Perfectly Good White Boy - Carrie Mesrobian

 

On Friday I remembered that I had book club on Sunday and that the author, Carrie Mesrobian was invited to talk about the book. I had a super busy weekend planned and knew that it would probably be near impossible to finish the book but I gave it a try because you're supposed to actually read the books for book club. I didn't finish the entire book by Sunday but the book was such a fast read that I made it far enough to fake it. I however, was honest to my fellow book club members and the author admitting that I was still reading the book (even though I peeked at the last couple pages so I knew the ending).

This is a book in a teenage boy's voice about having sex for the first time, figuring out what he's going to do after high school and just dealing with the day-to-day problems with family, work, girls and school like almost any other kid in this screwed up world.

My favorite parts of the book was when Sean was working at the Thrift Bin and looking for things to put on the breakroom shelf of weird donated items; million-year-old condom, crucifix made of wire hangers etc. I should do that with the things I find inside of books at the library (yikes). My other favorite scene was the first time he had sex with Hallie; oh the awkwardness of the condom. I also loved all the scenes with Otis - all of them.

The title of the book comes from the movie 'Better Off Dead' After Lane falls into a dump truck when trying to commit suicide off of a bridge; "Man, that's a real shame when folks be throwin' away a perfectly good white boy like that." I love that movie! Just not necessarily the title of this book. Did you know that authors aren't the ones that necessarily come up with the titles but that editors weigh in on the titles? Authors also don't have a lot of control when it comes to the cover art and I honestly said that I would have chosen the breakroom shelf as the cover.

I have given an honest review and rating of this book based on the superb writing of this story, even though I met the author Carrie Mesrobian at my book club and that she resides in my community. I recommend this book for older teens that are mature enough to handle the sex, drugs/drinking and swearing parts of the book.
Review
0 Stars
My Favorite Fangs: The Story of the Von Trapp Family Vampires
My Favorite Fangs: The Story of the Von Trapp Family Vampires - Alan Goldsher
  This isn't the warm and fuzzy 1965 version of the Sound of Music but a bloody-awful parody of it that will make you laugh at just how bad it is!

Maria von Trapp is a bloodthirsty vampire. When Maria is kicked out of the Abbey run by Mother Zombie where she’s been residing for the past thousand or so years, she lands a job caretaking the family von Trapp, a rowdy clan in need of some serious discipline… or vampirification. After Maria turns the von Trapp children into children of the night and marries the von Trapp patriarch, the family seems destined for eternal (really, really eternal) bliss. But Hitler’s Undeath Squads are on the march, intent on ridding Europe of bloodsuckers. And Maria will have to do everything in her power—supernatural or otherwise —to save her vampire brood.

Not everyone likes this book based on some of the reviews; "Goldsher's humor is juvenile and vulgar." "This book has the potential to be recycled as toilet paper." "This one was one of the worst books I have ever read." "Completely... stupid." "It ended up amounting to a badly-written colossal waste of time." "This book sucked!" "This book would only be acceptable at a book burning!" and they are all right but that is what makes this book one of My Favorite Things (Fangs)!


Cinnamon said, "We've tried to be friends for realsies, but she's proven to be, well, a problem."
Brandi said, "A big problem,"
Cinnamon said, "You see, Vampire Sister Maria is a bit of a flibbertijibbet."
Mother Zombie said, "What in the Devil's name is a flibbertijibbet?"
Brandi explained, "A whore."
"Ah," Mother Zombie said, "Flibbertijibbet. Whore. Makes sense to me. I'm not sure how Hammerstein would feel about it, but you know, fick him."


"I'll answer that with a question, Vampiress: What are your favorite things?"
"That's easy: Blood drops on roses and bloody-nosed kittens, and ..."


Another raspberry, "Zzzzzzzz! Besides, if the evolution of art means taking a perfectly boring movie musical and turning it into an even more boring book, I'd rather die for good."

This book is for mature audiences that have a sense of humor and don't mind sex, swearing, gore and vomit.

 

Review
5 Stars
Getting Real by Gretchen Carlson
Getting Real - Gretchen Carlson

I remember watching the Miss America Pageant in 1988 with my mother. I bet my mother that Maya Walker, Miss Colorado would win and she chose Gretchen Carlson, Miss Minnesota. Obviously, as a Minnesotan I secretly wanted Gretchen to win but the fun of the competition is to bet against each other. My mother and I sat watching Gretchen during her violin performance in the talent competition with tears streaming down our cheeks. I had to quickly brush the tears away so I wouldn't be a traitor to Miss Colorado. I was truly happy for Gretchen Carlson and Minnesota even though I lost the bet and had to cough up $5 (my Dad gave me the $5 - ha!).

Gretchen Carlson is the real deal! She shares her experiences and struggles with weight loss, learning the violin, becoming Miss America, breaking into television news, and the balance of marriage, motherhood and a career.

I found her story to be an inspiration to anyone that has a goal to achieve; whether it be weight loss, winning a competition or going after your career. I highly recommend this book!

"I'm a person who likes to give 100 percent to everything I do. I want to be the best at my job and as a mother. But I realize I can only give 100 percent in the moment."

"I know from experience how wonderful it to compete and win, and while it is disappointing to lose, it's also an opportunity for parents to teach kids a very important lesson - that failure is the key to success."

I received a free ARC of this book via NetGalley and the publisher, in exchange for an honest review.

Review
4 Stars
The Canterbury Sisters by Kim Wright
The Canterbury Sisters - Kim Wright

Che Milan’s mother has recently died. When an urn of ashes arrives, along with a note reminding Che of a half-forgotten promise to take her mother to Canterbury, the same day that a "Dear John" letter arrives in the mailbox Che finds herself undertaking a pilgrimage. She joins a group of women who are walking the sixty miles from London to the shrine of Becket in Canterbury Cathedral, reputed to be the site of miracles. In the best Chaucer tradition, the women swap stories as they walk, each vying to see who can best describe true love. Che, who is a workaholic, loses her cell phone at the first stop and is forced to slow down and really notice the world around her, perhaps for the first time in years.

It's interesting how The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer pilgrimage is similar in many respects to the Broads Abroad pilgrimage with the time of year they journey, that Che joins a diverse group of women on the Broads Abroad tour at an Inn or how each of the women share there own tales along the journey. The tales they share with each other are heartwarming and heartbreaking. My favorite was Silvia's but I will let her tell you her own tale.

Che is a Wine blogger who reviews the wines she drinks so the women drink a lot of wine in this book and there are a few quotes that I loved about wine. I encourage you to buy your own bottle of wine to sip as you savor their tales and the divine words that are used for inspiring quotes. Oh, and turn off your phone while you read this book or when you take a few steps toward Canterbury.

"Because books contain stories of things that have already happened and the liquor bottles on these high shelves before me hold stories of what is yet to be."

"And this goblet, I think, looking deeply into the one in my hand... something unexpected waits for me in the bottom of the glass. Some story will begin when I take my last sip."

I received a free ARC of this book via NetGalley and the publisher, in exchange for an honest review.

Review
2 Stars
Murder Freshly Baked by Vannetta Chapman
Murder Freshly Baked (An Amish Village Mystery) - Vannetta Chapman

I did not read the first two books in the series so I may have been a little lost not knowing who the characters were or much about the setting but I was underwhelmed by this mystery.

The first chapter of the book opened up with the murder of one of the characters being killed at the finish line of a race. Then the second chapter began one month earlier with the main character walking through town on her way to a yarn shop to knit/crochet discussing an Amish woman's interest in the "Englisch" guy that according to the first chapter will be murdered within the next month. There was no reason to become invested in their budding relationship or whatever was supposed to happen.

This book unfortunately was a struggle for me to read (again, I didn't read the other books in the series so that may be the reason).

I received a free ARC of this book via NetGalley and the publisher, in exchange for an honest review.

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